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In a recent Reddit post shared to the “Wedding Shaming” subreddit, one woman explained how she recently attended her younger brother’s wedding and later received a text asking for money.
“‘Hi [wife’s name] just told me she hasn’t received your $115 each no rush you can send it to 123@email.com,’” the Reddit post read.
“Now at no point before now was it communicated to me that they were charging guests to attend. Nowhere on the invitation either. Plus my husband and I already gave them $400 cash in their card.”
The woman continued in her Reddit post that the wedding was at an expensive restaurant in a private room with no open bar or dance floor. “We didn’t even drink alcohol that night and still paid $30 for pop and coffee plus Uber there and back,” she added.
Her brother told her that he thought she knew about the wedding attendance fee and he simply forgot to tell her. The two of them ended up getting into an argument as she told him she would send the money but he has to wait.
“Now I’m considering not sending anything and if he asks I’ll say oh I forgot. Oh did I mention I also got married in June this year and didn’t charge anyone a dime,” the post concluded.
After posting many people turned to the comments section, telling the woman to not send her brother any money, and if he was going to insist on guests paying for themselves, the money should be taken out of the $400 she gave the couple as a wedding gift.
“Hey bro, I put $400 in the card. I thought it was $200/per. Please send back the extra $270. Thanks. Love you and congrats again,” one commenter suggested she say tell her brother.
“That’s ridiculous on so many levels. Caving will only encourage this kind of bad behavior,” wrote another.
“Tell him they can take it out of the $400 enclosed in the card. My god, how tacky,” a third comment began. “If they’re going to be cheap and petty like this I’d send an itemized bill right back. Pay me for the Uber, pay me for what I spent on food/drinks, pay me for anything I spent on pre-wedding festivities. Dying to know what your parents think of this.”
The groom’s sister later provided an update on Reddit where she said her brother was not responding to her messages. “Don’t worry I’m not going to send him any more money,” she wrote.
After clarifying with other wedding guests, it was determined that the couple did charge all guests to come to their ceremony and she was the only person that wasn’t informed ahead of time.
She also shared the last message she sent to her brother. “I don’t know if you know this but it’s extremely poor etiquette to charge people to come to a wedding, on that principle I have changed my mind,” the text read. “Please deduct the charge for your wedding from my gift money you have already received. Thank you so much for understanding.”